How to encourage others

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by Debra Dane on June 12, 2012

in Mindset & Mindfulness

So often these days life moves fast, we are all busy and sometimes get very self-focused. We can get caught up in our own worlds and not stop to notice what others may need. In thinking of how I could do more to help others I kept coming back to the idea of encouragement.

 

I spend so much of my time encouraging my kids and husband and realised often what I am in need of is someone encouraging me – that feedback that I can do whatever I set my mind to, acknowledgement of a job well done, help through a rough patch. It always means so much to me when someone stops to send me a thoughtful email or meet for a coffee to catch up on my life – connection, being heard, a reassuring word.

I think the easiest way to know how to encourage others is to stop and think about what lifts you up, what motivates you, what can turn around a day or situation for you – and go do that for others in your life.

Inspire and motivate others

Sharing our stories, being honest about life, celebrating when we overcome hurdles. By being transparent with those in our lives (and on our blogs) we can encourage others by inspiring them that they too can overcome, advance and conquer challenges.

Listen and reassure others

Most of us want to be heard more than anything else. We don’t always need answers or someone to fix things, we need someone with a genuine interest to listen with undivided attention. The next time someone comes to you with a problem listen with your ears and heart without being distracted by thoughts of your own problem or a potential solution. Just listen fully and you will encourage someone on their path.

I love this post by Chantelle at Fat Mum Slim as to me it illustrates the power of listening. Stop, be open, listen fully to someone else and you never know what kind of effect you can have on their day or life.

Celebrate others

When you see someone has done something awesome tell them. When I see a friend looking good – new hair or a great outfit I stop to tell them that I noticed. Watch your friend walk away and I bet they will be smiling or have a bounce in their step. If you get great service, in this day and age of terrible customer service, stop and thank the person serving you. Even better – find their boss and tell them, or send an email, fill in that feedback survey, just make sure someone acknowledges this person so they know how they are appreciated.

Assist others

When we are self-focused we worry about how we can get our own stuff done and keep moving forward. When we are other-focused we see ways we can bring others along for the ride – how we can lift them up, promote them, share our knowledge to save them the headaches we endured. We don’t hold that even tighter while they pay their dues, we realise there is enough for everyone. We lift others and grow bigger ourselves. As a blogger – leave a blog comment (especially when you read a good post with no comments on it), promote someone’s post on Facebook or Twitter, link to a relevant post in your own. At work you can help someone cross a looming deadline or share a skill you have. Look in your life at how you can help others and you will find yourself encouraging great things.

 

How do you encourage others in your life?

 

Find your simple,

Deb

 

Since it is Tuesday i will link up with Jess and the wonderful bloggers fro IBOT – a linky that encourages bloggers and readers to check out blogs they might not normally read. Go read and drop a comment or two.

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{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }

Penny June 12, 2012 at 7:47 am

Beautiful post Deb with some important messages. ‘When you see someone has done something awesome tell them’ -Why do we not do this more? It’s so easy to make a persons day with just one thoughtful comment.

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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:24 pm

Thanks Penny – i agree one comment can make someone’s day!
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Catherine Rodie Blagg June 12, 2012 at 10:22 am

Loved this. Especially the celebrate sucsess part. Can you imagine a world where everyone actively encouraged each other? Wow.
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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:25 pm

It would be a great world! Thanks for stopping by catherine so i could find your blog today – nice to “meet” you.
Debra Dane recently posted..Teaching kids how to manage the endless wantsMy Profile

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Maxabella June 12, 2012 at 11:55 am

Encouraging is one of the things that I pride myself on being. I was raised to look for the good in others and praise them for their achievements. Sometimes I’m jealous of someone and I know that stops me from being encouraging. I try very hard to nip that in the bud.

Other people’s successes just enrich the world and our own lives through that. It is a joy to celebrate with them. x
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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:26 pm

I struggle with that too lately Bron- it does stand in the way of us truly supporting them. You have definitely always been encouraging in the blog world (thanks)!
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Ai Sakura June 12, 2012 at 11:55 am

a lovely post Deb. I find it easy to encourage my girl for the little things.. but sometimes fail to do that for adults. I think the little things matter for big people too :)
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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:27 pm

I think they do too Ai! It certainly lifts us up and reassures us!
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Grace June 12, 2012 at 12:57 pm

Inspiring post, Deb! I don’t think it takes much to do the things you’ve listed here. But unfortunately, we sometimes get so caught up in our own lives, don’t we?
I love seeing someone looking fabulous and letting them know I think so :)
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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:27 pm

Life is just so busy for most of us – we go through the motions all too often don’t we?
Debra Dane recently posted..Teaching kids how to manage the endless wantsMy Profile

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Mum of Adult Kids June 12, 2012 at 1:03 pm

This is a great post Deb! If every person said or did something to lift up, encourage or motivate another each day the world would be a better place. Even a smile and a kind word goes a long way!
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Debra Dane June 12, 2012 at 1:28 pm

I agree – a smile and a kind word can change someone’s day completely…
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Janet June 12, 2012 at 4:29 pm

I love this post … a little bit of encouragement goes a long way :-)
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Rita June 12, 2012 at 5:27 pm

thanks so much Deb. I love this post. It is a great reminder of how being nice/kind can have such a great effect on others.
It takes so little but means so much.
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Jess June 12, 2012 at 5:38 pm

Deb you do a wonderful job of encouraging others here on your blog. I love how altruistic you are; there is no desire for anything else, just the concern of others.

Funny you mention this, I was just checking my emails and there is one for a PR company I’m working with and I was thinking how easy they had made the whole process, and I wanted to tell them. I have found it such a blessing, so why keep that quiet?
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Rachel June 12, 2012 at 5:56 pm

This is a beautiful post. Thank you, Rachel x
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Denyse Whelan Education Specialist June 12, 2012 at 9:56 pm

Hi Deb,
My work life as a teacher, and my home life as a mother (now grandmother) has been all about encouragement. Finding the one thing that makes an individual special, as we all are of course, and making sure they know it. Blogging has given me opportunities to encourage others, and I have enjoyed the reciprocation.
My husband and I were talking about similar matters today, and he posed me the question “do you ever say to yourself well-done” …no
not much. Working on that now!
Good to be here again Deb.
Am visiting as part of #TeamIbot
Denyse
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Nee June 13, 2012 at 9:00 pm

This post needs to be included the orientation manual for being human xx
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