It’s resolution time all the world over.
Or is it goal setting?
Or a word for the year?
Whatever you want to call it, I love it all for the fact that it brings life into focus.
My word for this year was picked out a while ago – it is “fearless” and I am excited that I am already owning it fully. It is an interesting word though because it is subjective and therefore we will all have different views on what constitutes fearlessness. For some of you “bolder” people fearless would look like a wild adventure of bungee jumping and speaking in front of 500 people. For those who are very reluctant to take any risks it could mean going to a dinner party where you don’t know everyone or deviating from your favourite, comforting things in life.
I have lived for a very long time with fear holding me back.
Perfectionism means I am afraid to do seemingly simple things like learn to craft – I have bought supplies for jewellery making, scrapbooking, papercrafting and sewing (including a machine) and they sit and collect dust. What if I ruin fabric or can’t make that wire wrapped earring I envision?
A severe battle with Post natal depression meant I was afraid of who I had become. Would I ever be 100% healthy and happy again?
Staying at home with my kids for eight and a half years means I am afraid I have lost my identity as “me” and have to figure it all out again now that they are in school and I am starting “over”. So much self doubt when you have been away from the paid work force for years – where will I fit in and what will I do and how will I contribute?
Losing my father when I was fourteen makes me terrified of losing my husband – so I watch when he eats something unhealthy or his stress levels are high and live in fear he too will have a heart attack and leave me on my own.
And there is more… that I don’t think I will ever share here, but it will go – with all the rest. One day at a time, piece by piece they will all go.
Yesterday I launched the 52 weeks to simplify your life challenge. For me that was a fearless move.
There were so many “what ifs” and hesitation whether it was a bold or stupid move. I have been blogging for less than five months and my first fear was “what if I throw out this challenge and no one shows up”? (I would look like an idiot and I would take it on board as a sign of people’s lack of belief in me etc.) There were other fears as I debated whether to go ahead with this.
I have learned that I don’t have to have it all sorted out. I don’t have to get it perfect or worry about what might be. I only have to worry about one step at a time, one day at a time. What is in my head is nothing but my fear. The fear itself does not have a leg to stand on – what I do with the fear is what becomes the reality.
Fear holds us back from living the life we dream of – we let it do that. If we say no to fear, we say yes to life!
My plans for this year of a fearless life are undefined at this stage. It is not about having giant fearless goals or becoming a huge risk taker. It is about day by day simply saying yes to my life, however I want it to be. While that urge to run away from what I want is strong, I am choosing to take action and believe in myself more than I believe the fear.
Are you able to say no to fear and already live a fearless life? Or will you join me this year and find ways to push through the fear and live your life your way?
Find your simple,
Fearless girl is a print available from home goods
Thinking will not overcome fear
I am linking up with Jess at Diary of a SAHM for I blog on Tuesdays – go check out all the great blog posts being linked up!