Last week I was grateful for people watching and just sitting back and observing. How fast our needs and gratefuls can change. This week I am in need of talking – so much going on in my head that I need to talk to process it, seek out others’ views and advice, gain support so I am not thrashing these ideas out by myself.
I am grateful for my husband – he may not listen when I ask him to label something before sticking it in the freezer, but he listens when it really counts. Letting me unwind with a favourite TV show and then turning the television off, turning to face each other and just talk and get real with myself. He acts as that brilliant sounding board he has been for 17 years. Everyone needs someone in their life that knows them so well they can push or hold back as needed. This week he gently pushed me in a new direction for my thoughts and instead of getting defensive I finally got real with myself. It helped.
I am grateful for friends overseas that show up via skype. We share common ground, common dilemmas, common battles. We talk, share, offer advice, listen, talk some more, nod and sigh. We are not alone.
I am grateful for women I have met over the years my since children have entered school. Just as it takes the kids years to find their little group I feel it has been the same for me. The same advice I give them (friends make you feel good about yourself rather than make you cry, don’t chase friends who are running away, you are in charge of you) applies to me too. I am finding the women I gain nourishment from, the women who make me smile and laugh and think. Above all else they listen. I can tell the difference. Some women in my life I connect with, even laugh and smile, but I don’t feel seen or heard. So for those that fully show up when we are together I am forever grateful. Tonight I will be raising a glass (or 4) with some of them and I can’t wait to unwind, talk, laugh and truly listen.
Thank you for listening.
What are you grateful for this week?
Find your simple,
Deb
I am linking up with Maxabella and Kidspot for 52 weeks of grateful – check it out and support this wonderful collection of focus on all the little things that add up to a great life.
Image credit: Listen embroidered on hoop available on etsy from goose and trisser
{ 18 comments… read them below or add one }
Last night I wrote a post before I ventured out to dinner with old friends. I was feeling insecure and anxious.
What silliness. I had a wonderful night laughing and listening with friends I have known for almost a decade. They listened and validated and reminded me that all that matters is connection.
“Listens when it matters” says it all, really. I hope you find what you are also listening for, Deb. x
Maxabella recently posted..Old friends and the harshest critic
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 25, 2012 at 3:32 pm
I am so glad you had a good time Bron – i know it can be daunting especially after a lot of years have passed in between catch ups. and yes – all that matters is connection !xx
Debra Dane recently posted..Colour coding to simplify my life
Twitter: happylan
May 25, 2012 at 8:45 pm
How fantastic that you have these lovely listeners in your life. Enjoy your glass of wine (or four) Deb!
Happylan recently posted..Soulmates
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:32 am
Thanks so much – by the way am loving that little sneaky pic of your face… very cool!
Debra Dane recently posted..Colour coding to simplify my life
I guess I could say, through this blog, I am grateful to those who have listened to me these past twenty weeks throughout the Simplify Your Life Challenge. Weeks may go by and I’d see no one (except bus drivers, checkout chicks, lollipop man, teachers) so to have those in the challenge listening to me ramble on each week was priceless!
Simply Kate recently posted..Simply as Simply Kate
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:34 am
I am so happy that al those weeks, all those people were there for you kate. You are a beautiful person inside and out!
Debra Dane recently posted..Grateful for coming full circle
Twitter: Withgraceandeve
May 25, 2012 at 10:01 pm
Having a good listener to turn to is such a blessing! I am grateful for my sister, who listens oh so well x
Elisa {with grace and eve} recently posted..On calm days and chaotic ones too
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:34 am
That is great that you have that relationship with your sister – special and wonderful!
Debra Dane recently posted..Creative Ways to encourage kids to try new foods
Twitter: octaviaandvicky
May 25, 2012 at 11:05 pm
This is something I am so grateful for in my husband too, he is so good at listening and I call him “analogy man” LOL He can take any situation and turn it into an analogy that makes perfect sense. It’s a skill!
Kylie @ Octavia and Vicky recently posted..Easy DIY Wall Art
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:35 am
“Analogy man” is awesome Kylie – love it!
Debra Dane recently posted..Dealing with the extremes in life
I would be a lot more stressed and unhappy without good listeners in my life. Lovely Post.
Nat – Muddy Farmwife recently posted..Grateful For Sisters
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:35 am
Thanks Nat – definitely helps reduce stress and boost happiness having the right people in your corner! xx
Debra Dane recently posted..Dealing with the extremes in life
Twitter: Miss_Mandy76
May 26, 2012 at 11:20 am
so true, so true, hope you had a great night and lived up. I did a bit of that last week with a bunch of kinder parents, which are now some of my best friends.
Mandy recently posted..Garlic Prawns and Fettucini
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 26, 2012 at 11:42 am
We had some girl dramas last night (yes even in our 40s) but still enjoyed all the good moments, the wine, the laughter… Glad you had a night out too – we need them every now and then for sure. I am trying to get out with girlfriends monthly this year
Debra Dane recently posted..Colour coding to simplify my life
I miss catching up with old friends who can help me cut through the noise. It seems quite a few of us have been struggling with the noise issue lately. I wonder what that is all about?
Not having another adult to talk to for most of the week is my hardest thing right now. I get so busy with the noise that I forget to make those connections.
Dorothy @ Singular Insanity recently posted..Finding my way through the noise
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 28, 2012 at 4:57 pm
I hope you can find some connections that do help you cut through the noise Dorothy – sounds like chicken and egg territory…
Debra Dane recently posted..Colour coding to simplify my life
Hi Deb,
So lovely that you are surrounded by people who value and respect your opinions, who really see you. Girly nights out are so important too aren’t they? Interesting to read about finding your little group..my son is in grade one at school, and I feel like I’m still finding my feet, it can be hard, I don’t really fit in anywhere, although I know many Mums at the school individually and we have chats here and there, I guess these things take time, so I’m just going with the flow
Twitter: findyoursimple
May 28, 2012 at 5:01 pm
Sam my 2 are in grades 2 and 3 and I swear i am only just on the cusp of feeling at home. It can be hard. I decided this year to focus my limited time and energies on friendships that go 2 ways – hard to take a hint, but i do think that if i have been open to friendship with some for years and it is not forthcoming, it is never going to happen. So my advice is to be honest and in tune with connections you feel forming and definitely put yourself out there to test the waters as you go. Someone has to be the one to put out an invite, start the ball rolling. Last year we started being more intentional in inviting more families to have BBQ/dinner with us (usually us + 2 other families so the ice breaking was easier) and we have now found several families where both myself and hubby get along well with the adults and the kids all are happy together = bliss! (the people who never seem to be free or get back to me i have stopped putting my energy there and i am feeling happier)
Debra Dane recently posted..Dealing with the extremes in life