Grateful for the highlights

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by Debra Dane on February 15, 2013

in Gratitude

I am grumpy. There I said it. I have been holding myself together for a while and feeling pretty tired and irritable today. I know I am reaching the end of my rope because the last thing I wanted to do tonight was stop and write this gratitude post. Nothing tells me I need to write it more than my resistance to doing so.

I have had a smile on my face since we got back from the States, supporting my husband, saying it is okay that he has to be away all week, that I am simply grateful he has a job right now. The thing about that is it is not really true. It is what I want to feel so I act as I want to be. The truth is I am tired. I am letting things slide (even forgot to feed the chickens until 5 hours later the other morning). I want to be rescued rather than strong. I want someone else to cook or clean or sort the kids out.

There was my 2 minutes of whining. Done and dusted. Shake it off and back to the task at hand.

I am grateful this week. There have been highlights and they get so easily drowned out by the low moments.

Here are my fabulous highlights this week for which I am truly grateful:

We had hubby home Tuesday and Wednesday nights. It meant he watched the kids while I attended the school meeting. It meant I had at least one coffee in bed making me feel like the old days. It meant someone adult to eat dinner with. It meant someone laying beside me in bed. It meant my kids saw their father (although it only made them angry he was gone Monday night and leaving again Thursday morning – so confused between love and annoyance and I can relate to them).

I took tons of photos on Wednesday for listmania next week. I did not expect to enjoy it as much as I did.  My kids were involved, there were smiles, there was fun.

I had a catch up with Gillian and Stacey-Lee to talk life and blogging and life and blogging.

I ran into a friend on the street today while walking the dog. After standing next to her car talking for a while I finally asked her to come over for a drink. My morning had been shocking starting with waking at 5am for hubby to get ready to head to the airport, child with a “lost” recorder (was at school after all) making us late and having to jog to school… and I felt behind the 8 ball already at 9am. Instead of thinking “I have no time hurry up Deb” I went the opposite way and thought “take the time and have a 3rd coffee and chat”. Of course an hour chatting with a friend is always a good idea to turn around your day.

The positive side of waking at 5am was being given a coffee in bed and a Valentine’s card that I had not expected since I had not planned to be up before he left.

After school today the girls and I went to the mall to buy things for my youngest’s birthday party on Sunday. We went to Wagamama for Valentine’s dinner together and everyone loved their food leaving nothing over – wonderful. On the way home we got into a great chat which led to the topic of accents. In explaining how even in America you can have different accents I demonstrated with a Texas drawl versus a NYC tough accent. The girls loved my heavy NY accent and had me saying all kinds of things, trying to imitate me, begging me to speak like that for the rest of the night. At that moment in the car there was nothing but laughter.

Then bedtime stuff turned into stressful disaster and I was simply grateful for them in bed.

and now I am grateful I rented a movie and bought my ice cream at the store so I can go and chill out alone – well I do have the dog by my side. (of course as I typed that kids were out of bed again, there is stress over wobbly teeth just discovered including one I am sure has already fallen out and grown back previously oh joy…)

So now I have a 9 year old in my bed so I guess if you wish to not sleep alone you better be prepared for the way that is remedied. If you don’t specify grown up company you might just get little people company. At least she loves to read in bed with me in the morning.

 

What are you grateful for this week?

Find your simple,

Deb

 

linking up with Bron for 52 weeks of grateful

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{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }

Gillian February 15, 2013 at 7:03 am

I love all the different little glimpses into your days here Deb. It was lovely to catch up the other day and meet your gorgeous Evie! x x
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 1:20 pm

Thanks Gillian – and thanks for the treats – the girls loved them.
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Mandy February 15, 2013 at 9:55 am

hang in there, and good on you for hanging onto the highlights, sometimes it’s all that gets us through.
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 1:21 pm

Thanks Mandy – i could easily have let myself sink deeper but this is the best strategy i have for staying afloat – focus on the good, let the bad slide away xx
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Me February 15, 2013 at 11:29 am

Thanks for sharing your week. I have been trying to keep up a daily gratitude journal but I have been failing dismally at it – I even have an alarm in my phone to remind me but sometimes that alarm goes off and I just can’t think of one thing to be thankful for !! Sad, I know, because I have heaps to be thankful for.
I will be following listmania with interest on Monday but won’t be taking part as there is nothing interesting about taking a photo at my desk every hour unless I can get to do it on the weekend !!!!!
LOL at getting what you wished for – someone to sleep next to !!
Have a great week and good on you for taking the time to have an extra coffee and chat with a friend.
Love, hugs and positive energy !
Me
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 1:24 pm

Oh hon you are not failing! maybe switch to weekly like this (lets me reflect if i have not stopped and noticed things some weeks) or go back to basics (seriously some days a hot cup of coffee is the only thing i have stopped to be grateful for).

for listmania you can do any day you want so maybe try this weekend (and you don’t have to do every hour etc) xx
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Emily February 15, 2013 at 1:13 pm

“Nothing tells me I need to write it more than my resistance to doing so.”

This is the stuff of inspirational quotes! Glad you wrote the post. Lots of lovely moments – thanks for sharing.

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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 1:24 pm

Thanks Em – you made me all warm and fuzzy xx
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Debbie @ Aspiring Mum February 15, 2013 at 6:03 pm

“I want to be rescued rather than strong. I want someone else to cook or clean or sort the kids out.” Yes please! My husband comes home next week (for a little while before heading off in a few weeks’ time again). I should be used to it, but some weeks it is hard having to be all and do all. I didn’t get to writing my last 2 gratitude posts because I was just feeling blah – I’m glad you persisted with yours!
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 9:42 pm

yes the being all and doing all is what is getting to me – hope you have some quality time together -and you get some down time xx
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kirri February 15, 2013 at 6:25 pm

There’s nothing wrong with being grumpy right?

It’s healthy to be honest about how we are feeling. As you pointed out, it’s only then that we can shake it off.

Gratitude practice reminds me of meditating – some days you really feel it and experience it a deep level and other days, you just practice it.
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 9:48 pm

yes – that is so true kirri! xx
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ally February 15, 2013 at 8:13 pm

I was going to pick out the quote Emily did…it rings true
Some weeks the gratefuls just fly off the keyboard but the other weeks they are more hard work but so worth seeking out
x
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 9:55 pm

definitely worth it and the thing is when i set out to just find a few things it leads to more and more and suddenly i realise just how blessed my week was even with the hard times xx
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Lee February 15, 2013 at 8:51 pm

Grumpy is totally allowed and so is wanting to be rescued. It totally sucks when no-one does rescue you though! I relate to the love/ annoyance thing of a absent partner/ father. As do my kids.
Still, plenty to be grateful for. I must start writing these posts myself as I promised I would! Hope this week is a little more restful Deb. xx
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 10:04 pm

Thanks Lee – i hope you do start writing them – it is amazing the effect they have!
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Lisa@RandomActsOfZen February 15, 2013 at 9:47 pm

Oh Deb, sometimes a little grumpy is what we need to get it all out. Good on you for looking at the positives and sharing them with us. And isn’t it so lovely to have a laugh with your little ones? xx
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Debra Dane February 15, 2013 at 10:07 pm

yes – and when things are not great i notice less laughter – it felt so good to not be nagging or cranky, but just laughing and enjoying my sweet girls! xx
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Shell February 16, 2013 at 9:24 am

I so relate to the beginning of your post Deb – we’ve had a shocker of a week here. “Mr Sow” had 2 days home with gastro, then out at a job stepped on a metal spike on Thurs – when I was taking my listmania pics which I continued to do as if it was a normal day? Anyway, now he’s in & out of hospital on IV antibiotics twice daily with an infection, and I just wish I was the one who could have some downtime in bed rather than take care of everyone & everything! Talk about un-grateful!!! And self-centred!!! But I’m trying to focus on the joy & the happy moments, which there are still lots of. I know things will be better soon, and he’s having the worst of this. Big breath. Keep going. xoxo
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Debra Dane February 16, 2013 at 9:30 am

big hugs – that is the thing – you want to be supportive and caring and dont feel you can be self centred.. Went to a friend’s yesterday for dinner and she asked about his work etc and when i shared she said “he must be exhausted” and i said “me too” and she laughed but acknowledged it is true. people think of the “hard worker” as suffering but the one holding the fort suffers too.

hope your hubby is ok and that you are ok too – xx
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Nat - Muddy Farmwife February 16, 2013 at 2:35 pm

Gorgeous Deb, so many lovely highlights in your week!
Sometimes I feel like crap and it takes the gratefuls to make me realise there are more positives than negatives, always try to change it around.
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Elisa {With Grace& Eve} February 16, 2013 at 2:47 pm

Love this post Deb. Not the hard parts but that you noticed your resistance to writing and did it anyway, and that your week had so many beautiful highlights. May next week be smoother for us both xx
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Kelly February 18, 2013 at 1:40 pm

it’s wonderful how something as simple as finding some gratitude in the everyday can make you feel better when you’re feeling low. It’s hard in lots of ways when you’re doing the job of both parents! Hope you have a great week! :)
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